"My aappey aappey" is your
En-jabi (English + Punjabi) phrase to tell the world that you want to do it
yourself. At times it is followed by a 'My Help' as a push back to any help
offered to your little bundle of effort. Each time the door to your car seat is
held open, it is like a challenge assigned by yourself, for yourself to climb the Everest
of that seat - your own 'aappey aappey' self!
There is a certain self-assured, confident style to your ascent
too, even at this age. On my car, with a fairly high child seat for your little hands
and knees to mount, you start with touching, toying and fumbling with the
various knobs and hooks on the frame. When an easily bemused Dad gently cajoles
you to proceed with your mountaineering efforts, you start climbing on the
various toys, bags and other assortments lying there, before getting a foothold on the car
seat itself. It doesn't take you long from there to latch onto your car seat. Once there, you make an
awkward but surprisingly swift pull to the rest of your self onto the seat. A magical manoeuvre of twist later, lo and behold ! You are seated on your throne. Both of us, all smiles at yet another successful execution of the 'Aappey aappey' routine (Yes I’m
fond of repeating that phrase myself ☺)
You have other cute versions of 'my aappey aappey' at this young
age. The latest being wearing your sandals inclusive of needling the strap
through the tiny buckle.
Besides the present and lively smiles on both our faces, your
attitude to get across all hurdles is a source of immense satisfaction to me.
You seem to have inherited the do-it-yourself attitude that your Daadi
(Grandma) inculcated in us and other of your Grandparents aren't (weren't)
short of either.
Your 'Shaasha' (originally Ramisha-speak for Chaacha - uncle)
recently spoke to some audience in Dubai (maybe a 100 but no harm quoting it as
hundreds when you narrate it years from now!) about trends in hiring by leading
corporates in world. According to this research, companies when looking for
leadership skills no longer look for the candidate with greatest of
achievements in their career. Instead, they look for the person who has seen
the worst of failures and managed to get over it.
That to me is both fair and motivating in more ways than one. In
our own ways and perceptions we all see failures. Big or small, obvious or
worth introspecting about – that is life’s way of giving us chances. The key is
to not let the failure be the start of a self-sympathising sob story for you. Often
easier said than done but all it means is that you need to redefine either your
approach and/or your criteria for success. Maybe your success was in the fact
that you tried in the first place. Or maybe you were more than successful
already because you tried and had fun in your efforts!
And it all starts with you being able
and willing to take control of your life, your definition of success – as it always
is your ‘aapey aapey’.
No God, no God men, no husband, friend or
parent or any measure of hocus-pocus prayers would do you any good if you don’t
start helping yourself. You are the sole and only author that matters for your own
destiny. It doesn’t mean you are not allowed to fall and falter. It is OK if
you have to tear through a few draft versions of your writing. It means you
always have a choice to take care of yourself.
I hope you get to the pinnacle of your choice in your life,
climbing over the bags of rubbish that the world will throw at you. Maybe us -
your parents too. And on your way up there, keep playing with your choices –
toying and pushing the buttons of all options around you. Enjoy the journey for
that's what really matters, not the seat that it gets you to. After all, the
destination will always be just a child seat, an enclosure to give you that sense
of safety for the next adventurous journey.
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